Day 13

 

Day 13- Signs

My dear friends from CC. From left: Liz Adams, Kelly Stallone,
Cindy Eames, and Nora Huggins.

 

When I read the title for this day, I knew immediately who the subject would be. We've been involved in what I can best describe as a homeschool coop, Classical Conversations, for four years. I say all the time it's the best homeschooling decision we've ever made. I didn't know how God was going to use this community in our lives for even greater purposes. Our school year with CC ended in April 2011 just a couple of weeks before Joshua's diagnosis. After that fateful ultrasound and amnio, I sent an email to our director Nora and my kids tutors letting them know what we were facing and asking them to pray. From the very beginning, I was so encouraged by their emails and prayers, but at one of our summer beach outings, Nora approached me and shared about the loss of her baby girl, Sarah.  This was the first time I began to see the support network that God was weaving together. 

 

We had been back to class for 2 weeks when Joshua was born, but had not shared with the whole community about what we were facing. Nora sent out an email to all the families to let them know what had happened after his death, so I could avoid people asking me where the baby was. A week following his birth and death, we returned to CC in an effort to keep some normalcy for the kids, and after the opening Cindy Eames approached me and told me about the loss of her daughter, Molly and invited me to a support group she attended. I had a pamphlet for the group from the hospital, but only attended because of her personal invitation. Her friendship and support have been such a meaningful part of my healing process.

 

I walked Charlotte to her class that day after opening and sat in as I had previously done. Mrs. Stallone was new to the group and a new tutor that year. After finishing Charlotte's class, Kelly approached me and told me she had lost her baby boy, Scott. She was very emotional as she shared with me her experience. I was talking to someone that I knew really understood how I felt . She got it.

 

The next week following opening, one of the mom's I really didn't know  at all, Liz Adams, discreetly passed me a card. We had received many very thoughtful cards, and that's what I was expecting this one to be as well. Imagine my surprise when I opened it and read that she had lost her son, Michael.  I thanked her later and she shared her story with me. We were both in tears in the lunchroom.  In the months since, she always asks me how I'm doing. I know that I don't have to give her the answer I think most people want to hear. "I'm OK." I can tell her the truth.

 

I have no doubt that God's purposes for bringing all these amazing women together are many. It wasn't strictly for my benefit, but I am profoundly grateful that He placed each one of them on my path. I'm heartbroken to think of the loss of each of these precious babies and the grief each one of my friends have endured. Each of them are further along the winding road of grief than I am, but seeing them caring, smiling and surviving gave me a lot of hope on my worst days that I would get through it, and they always rightfully pointed me back to Christ through their words and deeds.  These mommies are perfect examples of the scripture I quoted in a previous blog:

 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

 

Praise be to God the Father of our Lord Jesus the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God

They are living, breathing proof- signs- of God's love, mercy and grace to me.